So Ethan was always a Daddy's boy unless he was sick, then he wanted me. This made sense since Steve was home all day with him until he was 18 months old - lots of quality time. This didn't really bother me because I still got lots of loves and kisses and snuggle time. Then Alex came along and was pretty much a Mama's boy. He didn't want to snuggle with Daddy - he wanted Mama. From the moment I would walk into his line of sight, he'd be all over me. This started tapering off a bit lately and the dynamic began to change.
Alex no longer wanted to be with me so much when I was home. He's totally mobile now and can play so was completely content to do that with any of us - me, Steve or Ethan. If he hurts himself, Daddy can kiss it just as well as Mama can - he isn't biased either way anymore. So all of sudden Ethan has started asking me to cuddle with him or even rock him to sleep (which he'll even request right after waking up - he really means for me just to rock with him but since usually when I'm rocking, I'm rocking Alex to sleep, Ethan asks me to rock him to sleep). This is really the sweetest thing but poor kid - he doesn't get much quality time because the second he climbs into my lap, Alex is ALL over me. I could have just asked Alex to come to me and snuggle and he'd have told me no and run the other direction, but if his brother climbs up, he is like a little boy to candy - all over me. He will even try to push his brother out of the way to get "his" spot. I usually end up with one on my left and one on the right rocking in the chair - not very comfortable as one of them is plenty heavy by himself but I can't very well pick one over the other at that point.
I've realized though that Ethan wanting this time now is partly due to his own jealousy and insecurity. His brother is now taking more of his time from his Daddy and he used to be able to just climb up on my lap if his Daddy was busy with something else but then Alex came along and was taking that spot, too. He was not jealous of Alex earlier on - he was too busy being completely infatuated with his brother. Now, however, it's starting to sink in that he has to share his toys AND his Mama & Daddy with this other kid. Couple that with everyone telling him what a "big boy" he is now and it's a bit much for him. I thought I had a problem with him growing out of the "baby" stage but he's having a hard time with it a little bit himself. Don't get me wrong, there are several things he wants to do when he "gets bigga" but he still wants to be the little boy who gets cuddled and loved on, too.
Alex is a bit outrageous though with his jealousy. At this point I almost have to get Ethan to come cuddle with me in order to get any of Alex's time at all. He's too busy to cuddle; even when he's so tired he can't stand up straight, there's still too many other cooler things he could do than snuggle with his Mama. Unless Ethan wants to cuddle. That is absolutely not ok with Alex as I've said. But it's starting to get really bad - he doesn't just shove his brother to the side; he'll smack at him or pull his hair, too. That is not ok and we need to break that habit quickly. Steve says when Ethan is on his lap, Alex comes over as well to join them. But unlike with how he refuses to leave my lap until after Ethan does; Steve says with him, Alex just climbs up, sits a sec and hops back down to play again.
OK - I admit it's nice that my boys fight over me but when it comes to hitting and pulling hair, I draw the line. The green-eyed monster is here in the Waters house and now that Daddy is home all the time, it's showing up more often. My first baby is feeling the pull of Mama & Daddy away from him by his brother and not happy about it and my second baby is just rotten and wants to be the center of everyone's attention at all times. The latter doesn't deserve to be catered to but the former does warrant a little bit of reassurance so we'll have to find a way to work this out. Green-eyed monster - I'm on to you so watch out, your days at my house are short lived.
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